Crossroads

I'm sitting on my floor and I wonder
Are we a joke?
Are we a blunder
or a dream?
Made by a child? A man? A God?

Why?
What does he want?
What does SHE want?
Why do I want
what I want
that makes me travel miles away
from everyone I know and love
and care for
just to pursue a blunder
or a dream
that makes me wonder
lonely,
alone
on my floor?

Am I born for this?
Are we born for something?
Anything?
Destined to be
what I want to be?
So should I do
all that I do
if at the end it's all the same?
Shouldn't I just live
and let it all be
because it will be
what it should be
at the end of the game?

Or can I only attain
Everything attainable
through reach of muscle
and power-
man power,
brain power,
and hope-
if I use everything in my power
anything in my power
to climb through life's zoetrope?
Should I work my hardest
to be the greatest,
smartest,
to get where I get
when I want?

What should I do?
What do you want
you person
or thing
or force
that drives us
pushes us
pulls us
taunt?

Am I changing my life
right now, as we know it?
If I get up and go
and work for my dreams
the means
which home alone I tend
will they come true?
Will I bang at the end?

Or what if I sit?
What if I stay?
What if I go
and live with the love
of family
and friends
til the end of my day?
Will I still bang?
Will I still pop?
Or will my life tumble
fumble
drop?

I guess what I want
is to know what to do
God help me
Cuz I don't have a clue
I sit on my floor
lonely
alone
I'm missing the lives
of the people I left at home
But if I go back
Will I not go on
To the things I'll still remember
from my dreams
at early dawn?
What am I missing
at the greener side of the lawn?

Work=Life
and
Home=Love

What do I do?
I can't hear you!
Speak louder
You!
Living, up above!